302 - Organic

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Thank you for your repeated business What’s Inside Novelty Stationery Products!

We at What’s Inside are dedicated to providing the highest-quality novelty promotional heart-shaped ink-sticks for your patients to lose between their car seats on the drive home if by chance they happen to forget to throw them in the waste basket on the way out of the hospital.

We’re sending you this e-mail to notify you of our expanding product line of useless branded junk! Not content to rest on our laurels as southwest Milwaukee’s leading manufacturer of red heart-shaped pens, we’re bringing new selections to the What’s Inside menu.

Starting November 1st, we will be introducing an entire line of internal organ-shaped promotional items. The new selection will include:

-Lung-shaped whoopee cushion – Breathe out the relief!

-Ribcage Comb – Keeps your hair straight and your organs safe!

-Spleen Stress-relief ball – Squeeze as hard as you want, you can technically survive without it!

-Liver Pillow – Sleep on a cushion of iron!

-Small Intestine Crazy Straw – Put your mouth on it!

We hope you’re as excited about our new offerings as you are, and look forward to your future orders! I mean, the margin on this crap is ridiculous!

 

With Thanks,

The What’s Inside Team