359 - Not Technically Fraud

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Your home-made defibrillator has worked like a charm yet again. Your grandfather has survived his third heart attack in as many days thanks to your electrical skill and liberal hollering of the word "Clear!"

That social security check train's gotta keep on a rolling if you're going to keep all those online porn subscriptions going. A dollar a month really adds up quickly.

You've considered loosening the belts on gramps' bed or maybe letting him go outside, but you know he'd try to "save himself" by "calling the police" or some such nonsense. Really, your chief fear is he'll get run over by a truck or something if he runs out of the house. Best to leave him be.

It's a good thing you feed him so little he almost never has a bowel movement; you've never been much for changing diapers.