506 - No Skateboards


Please respect our rules while enjoying the park:

Only one child on the slide at a time: Everybody can thank Billy McCandless for this one. His home address is 2332 Magnolia. Go thank him.

Pants must be worn at all times: The fact that we have to post this one is, as human beings, thoroughly embarrassing, but the attorney said it would help repeat any “additional embarrassments” in the case of future litigations.

Leash law is still in effect: Doms, don’t let your subs run wild.

Dogs must pick up their own poop, no more human assistance: You nasty fuckers just can’t keep your disgusting poop-hands to yourselves.

No Skateboards: Roller blades are coming back. Mark my words: you skateboarders are going to feel real fucking dumb for backing the wrong horse.