293 - All the Dicks of the Rainbow


Finally, your sex life has taken a turn for the better. You'd been searching for that missing piece that would complete the puzzle of a healthy and fulfilling bedroom adventure for years, and you knew as soon as you laid eyes upon the packaging of the neon-colored condoms that your search had come to an end.

No longer will you sit in the dark limbo of bland, skin-colored fucking. Now and ever after your tube steak will be adorned in the most flamboyant latex finery.

You think you'll go with neon yellow. Yeah. Girls won't know whether to hop on your johnson or use it to highlight important passages in their textbooks.

It's the dawn of a new day. The future's bright, and so is the rubber you've rolled over your penis.