106 - Harassment



Tim is once again in your cubicle. Once again he has placed his hand on your shoulder. Countless explicit rebuffs of his advances have done nothing to curb his behavior. Two formal complaints to Human Resources have done nothing to remove him from the office. It is time to take matters into your own hands.

Tim attempts to ‘compliment your apparel’ as he often puts it. “You know, Erica, your blouse really accentuates your breasts quite nic-“

Interrupted by a stream of water splashing in his face, for about five seconds all Tim can do is stand motionless with a dumb (well, dumber than usual) look on his face. He comes to and looks down to see the spray bottle in your hand.

“What the hell?” he asks.

“What the hell, indeed, Tim? We’ve worked together for two years, and I’ve never known a moment’s peace from your harassment. Nothing else has worked so I, along with the other women in the office, have come to a decision. As long as you continue to treat me like a piece of meat, I will continue to treat you like an animal.”

“A piece of meat? What are you talking about? I was just saying that shirt makes y-“

“Ah –AH!” you shout as you give Tim a couple more pumps from the spray bottle.

“Are you crazy, you bi-“

“NO!” you scold, and spray him again. “Erica’s cubicle is for PEOPLE, not TIMS!”

Tim has no more words. He walks away utterly confused. You see him pause in the aisle and appear to shake it off before turning into Stephanie’s cubicle. You hear a mumble exchange of words between them before a loud *POP* rings through the air. Before you know it, Tim is running out of Stephanie’s cubicle and down the aisle past you. Stephanie chases behind Tim, holding a rolled up newspaper high above her head.

Stephanie stops just a few feet past your cubicle and watches Tim round the corner and run to the other side of the bullpen. She shouts after him “BAD Tim! No treat!” before turning to make her way back to her cubicle.

You hold your hand out to Stephanie for a silent high-five as she passes.

Today will be a good day.